Nationalism vs. Culture

I am a Pakistani American. If a census was elaborating demographic details of the US, I would fall under this category. This label generates an identity crisis and consequently delineates the dual life that I live. On one hand, I have to assimilate and conform to the American way. Neglecting this duty would undermine my US citizenship and be blatantly disrespectful to my peers and friends. On the other hand, I have an obligation to uphold my Muslim principles and reflect my Pakistani values. The key is balance, but most definitely easier said than done. I hate nationalism. Regardless of its benefits, the costs of blind and negligent patriotism are extremely high. Think about the Holocaust or the genocide in Rwanda. Both utilize heavy nationalistic propaganda although there were disparate sources for these atrocities. Similarly, I don't feel that coloring my personality red, white, and blue or green and white creates any sort of pleasure or serenity for the mind. It just divides us all through facets we have no control over (such as race, sex, etc). But culture is different. A man who doesn't know his history can be fooled into repeating the mistakes of his ancestors. A man who knows not his values or recalls his moral upbringing is spitting on the graves of those forefathers that sacrificed their lives for such codes. A man who can not communicate in his mother language has been stripped of the most basic freedom to understand and indulge in dialogue. The moment that culture kisses the lips of nationalism, there becomes a dire conflict of interest. The mixing of dedication to a government verses dedication to a lifestyle breaks the concordance of secularism. One should hold these principles mutually exclusive. I have seen the freedoms of America which are deprived to many Pakistani people. I have seen the simplicity of Pakistan that is denied to the First World. Somewhere between both cultures, I exist. But never to wave a flag, sing an anthem, or pledge my allegiance. I claim the label "Pakistani American" with pride, for those before me that gave me the fortitude to claim it. But it is just a label. What's hidden behind such categorization is the actual implementation of culture. Unfortunately, the whole product often becomes the amalgamation of culture and nationalism. For shame.